In his first year, Obama has been a constant source of unwitting amusement to many as he plods through his first year as President. Other Presidents, such as Gerald Ford, have had their moments because of various foibles committed by them during their terms. President Ford had a penchant for falling down Air Force One stairs, much to the chagrin of his press Secretary and to delight of the M.S.M. and Saturday Night Live.
3. Your college tuition will be free. Why should you leave your parent's house and struggle to get a grant or a student loan or pay tuition when everything will be given to you? It's a fact that under Obama you will get a "B" for just showing up in class now.
4. There will be no world conflict because we will all get along now. Everybody loves Obama. Terrorism has begun to end now that the world knows we are harmless. We no longer have anything to fear. All overseas terrorist attacks don't affect us because we live so far away
5. No one will hate America anymore. Everyone knows that the only reason that all the world hated us was because of George W. Bush. He’s gone, problem solved.
6. You won't have to worry about gun violence or crime. Obama is against guns, gun ownership, and is against concealed carry of handguns. His attorney general announced that Obama “has a few things he wants to do with guns.” We can join Europe in making guns illegal. They have no crime problems.
7. Your health care will be free. We are modeling our free health care after the efficient systems in Canada and England. Health care is for the healthy and the young. Valuable resources won't be squandered in treating the elderly because they have lived their lives. He will give every elderly person a Yugo. "Here are some pain pills for you to relax with. Now, Yugo take them."
The Eskimos used to set their elderly outside in the winter when they got too old. Now we can depend on Obama to do this for us.
9. And, of course, free food too. Some people get free food now, but the program will expand for everyone. Instead of shopping, You will just show up at a government warehouse free super market and get all the free food that you can eat. Please, always be thoughtful and courteous and not take too much.
10. The wealthy will pay for everything. Need he say more?
11. Chicks dig socialists